Cancer – A Public Service Announcement

I recently learned that a friend of mine died after a long battle with cancer. The news came to me while I was in a blissful state of mind, following a recent visit to my oncologist. I was told that I’m cancer-free and was filled with gratitude. I’d been contacting my family and friends, sharing good news and thinking how different these calls were, compared to those I’d made when I was first diagnosed. Now I’m picturing my friend’s family, making the saddest calls of all.

Cancer takes lives in many ways. It may last for decades, with alternating periods of illness and remission. It can claim its victims after a few years, because the organ it’s invaded is more vulnerable or the type of cancer is more deadly. And cancer might also be fatal within a few months, because it was diagnosed too late and treatment is futile. I’ve heard too many of these stories, lately. “He was gone in three months!” “She felt fine, but her new job required a physical and they discovered she had cancer.” “He was only 35; they don’t do a colonoscopy until you’re 50!” The last remark was made by a nurse who was tending to me during my recent check-up.

It’s common knowledge that the earlier cancer is detected, the better the outcome will be. Having periodic diagnostic tests is very important, but I’d like to discuss another important component of cancer prevention. I’ll briefly tell you my story, even though the details are very “personal.” My heartfelt intention is to help anyone I can by sharing my experience with this life-changing illness.

While I was at work one day, I used the bathroom and was surprised to discover a small amount of blood in the toilet. Obviously, I was somewhat concerned, but I felt fine, so I returned to my desk. About an hour later, I became a bit dizzy and called a friend who drove me to the hospital ER. After an examination, the doctor told me I had an internal hemorrhoid that had developed a blood clot. I asked what the treatment was and the doctor said no treatment would be necessary. She suggested I “wait until it becomes too annoying” and at that point contact a surgeon, who would remove the hemorrhoid with a simple procedure.

It’s my opinion that if something’s in your body that isn’t supposed to be there, it should be removed. Waiting can necessitate a more involved or extensive procedure; I prefer to nip my medical issues in the bud. So, the next day I called a few surgeons for a second opinion. During one call I was asked “Were you bleeding?” When I answered “Yes,” I was told “We need to see you today.”

During my visit, I was examined and three biopsies were taken. Four days later the surgeon called me to explain that I had a rare form of rectal cancer. Luckily, further tests revealed I was in Stage One, but the tumor was growing rapidly, so my treatment needed to begin ASAP. The goal was to avoid surgery through the aggressive use of chemotherapy and radiation. I met with my team of doctors, learned as much as I needed to be an active participant in my cancer treatment, spiritually prepared myself for “battle,” and with loving support from my family and friends went through four months of treatment, eventually emerging as a grateful cancer survivor. My tumor was completely destroyed and I did not need surgery!

When I tell my friends this story, almost every one of them remarks, “I would have just gone home and waited for the situation to worsen,” as was suggested to me in the ER. One of my physicians remarked that oncologists rarely see a case of rectal cancer in Stage One, because people assume they have an internal hemorrhoid or simply ignore their symptoms. I recently read that instances of this type of cancer are increasing, because most people wait until they’re in real distress before seeing a physician.

The point I feel compelled to make is this: Pay attention to your body’s signals and take action. I realize that many people avoid second opinions or doctor visits because they fear hearing “bad news.” However, if you let fear guide you, the news you get at a later date could be worse than what you’ll hear today. It’s been said that we’re motivated by either fear or love. Please, love your body and listen as it guides you!

Picture Perfect

The first image I saw today was a photo of Katy Perry, sitting on the edge of an unmade bed in her bra and panties. Millions of people will see this photo, since it graces the cover of Rolling Stone magazine. What people won’t see is the “before” image of Katy, which wasn’t “perfect enough,” so it went through the Photoshop editing process. The changes are so subtle that I wondered if I’d ever see an untouched photo of a woman in print again.

I realize that people in the beauty and entertainment industries feel a greater pressure to look “perfect” than those of us who live outside the public eye. However, many men and women create unrealistic standards for themselves and retouched photos are repeatedly blamed for inspiring impossible expectations. I’ve often told my daughter how beautiful she is, because it’s the truth, despite any self-criticism she may inflict upon herself. We’ve spoken more than once about the standard headlines that appear on the covers of “women’s” magazines. These include some variation of the following: “Get Your Body Bikini-Ready!” – “The Fool-Proof No-Carbs Diet!” – “Your Perfect Hairstyle” and “Flawless Make-Up, Day to Night!”

As far as my own body goes, I’ve one of those folks whose metabolism makes gaining weight difficult. I also have a low cholesterol level. I can eat the foods I enjoy and not worry about my weight. In fact, there have been times when I’d have welcomed some extra pounds. One of these instances occurred last year, when cancer and its treatment caused my weight to dip to an all-time low. Over the last few months, I’ve been eating three square meals a day and snacking in between, in an effort to reach a healthy weight. During a recently check-up, I was thrilled to learn that I’d reached my goal and then some. That evening, while preparing for a visit home to see family and friends, a new reality set in. With the exception of the sweats I usually wear, none of my pants fit! It took some extra time, but I finally gathered enough clothing for my two week vacation.

While staying at my mother’s home, she encouraged me to buy new clothes and generously gave me some money towards a shopping spree. I drove to the local Marshall’s and dove in. After settling into a fitting room, I was pulling on a pair of jeans when something new happened. I faced myself in the mirror and noticed that I had a belly! Actually, two bellies; one from my C-section and one from too many ice cream sandwiches. Suddenly, there I was, sucking my abdomen in and frowning as I noticed the bulge that stubbornly stayed above my waistband. I was confused and disgusted and heard my inner voice scolding me. And then I was yanked into a new reality: I was guilty of judging myself by the very standards I thought I was immune to. It was quite a moment, and not a very proud one.

I’ve had some time to think about that day and I’ve come to some conclusions. There may always be times when I compare myself to other women, be it someone I know or an image in a magazine. What’s important to me is to separate the expectations I’ve been fed by the media from those that I’ve set for myself. I want to celebrate my body, thanking it for serving me well during my lifetime, especially during the last few challenging years. I want to honor my body by providing it with healthy food and regular exercise. And I want to love my body, no matter what shape it takes, because right this minute, it’s perfect!

Katy Perry Rolling Stone